Friday, February 24, 2012

FAMILY PLUS High School - February 23

Hello HS Parents

This past Wednesday night we started a new series in the District called Evolve. For the next few weeks we will be focusing on the fact that students are in the middle of a transitional period where the parent/child relationship is in a constant state of change. In fact, I suggested to them that they should really be prepared for the next few years to be a time where they are learning to adapt to the changing relationship they have with LEAVE ROOM for your ever important voice in their lives as they walk through a time where your voice can be distant compared to others in their lives.

I also wanted to share with you how Robert and I put into practice a tool we regularly suggest to parents. We had the privilege of meeting a young man for lunch this week - he's a guy we've had a little difficulty "connecting" with at church. But we took our own advice: we took him out to lunch and to hit a bucket of range balls. We all three had a GREAT time getting to know each other and there was much less pressure because our focus was not gaining information - it was having fun and hanging out. Guess what - the "gaining information" part just happened. The student learned about us and we learned about him, but none of us were "trying" to do that - we were just hanging out.

I had a similar conversation with a parent recently who wanted to do a Bible study with his son. The son was VERY adamant that he did not want to participate. But the dad and I re-strategized the plan for the two of them to view a DVD study together once a week and go have dinner afterward. This gives them time in the car (to and from the restaurant) to talk. Again, the focus is on something else, but natural conversation can (and likely will) happen based on both of them focusing on something else. The content of the study (it's a pretty deep study that will make BOTH of them think) will help facilitate conversation.

Remember - sometimes you need to have targeted, intentional conversation with your students. But sometimes you should just "do life" with them and allow the content of your conversations to happen naturally. It is likely that your student will stumble into talking to stuff that is closer to their hearts than they might convey if you are interrogating them like the gestapo!

Let me know how I can pray for you.


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